I'm not sure why I can't seem to blog anymore. Lots of things have been happening. TONS of things are going through my head. I just can't seem to put it all together. But I want to. I want to be able to look back here and remember how this time felt. So I'm gonna force myself to write a full post here and see if that will kick start something. So here goes!
Tomorrow I will be 37 weeks. Next week will be my last week working, although when I go to the doc today, I may try to get them to write up something so that this week can be my last. Working hurts! Sitting for too long hurts cause my chair isn't the most comfy thing. Standing for more than 5 or so minutes gives me Braxton Hicks. The worst thing is that when we are fairly busy, I have to get up and down a LOT! Run back and forth to one of the 4 printers that we use to print different types of documents. So in helping one customer, I might have to get up and down 4 times. It doesn't feel good.
Last week the munchkin started to drop. Since then I can breathe again, but he is back on my sciatic nerve. And walking feels odd and somewhat painful. Lots of pressure down below.
One of the things that I have been spending most of my time on lately is avidly reading all of the books on childbirth. I'm making a list for hubby of all the pain relieving techniques so he can help me remember and suggest things at helpful times. I'm really hoping to make it through without any meds. To go along with this, I am taking childbirth classes from a private group that employs doulas and midwives. Its a great organization and the classes have been amazingly helpful (especially for hubby who was floored when she acted out what a contraction on hands and knees might look like).
Well thats all for now. I'm hoping to start a post today on some of the things I'm struggling with. We shall see how it goes. I have to leave in 1.5 hours for both of my weekly appointments so it may not happen til tomorrow :)
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Sweet Relief
First off, we are NOT moving!!! Hubby was offered the job in Texas, but the pay was about the same as the pay he gets here, but the insurance cost would have been lots more (over $800 per month for all three of us!?!?!). Plus our current house payment is super cheap since we bought a forclosure so that would be higher there too. Bo basically no dice.
I'm a little sad not to be moving closer to family, but I'm very relieved not to be moving. On that note, we finally put the crib together!!
34 weeks 2 day & a Crib!! Hubby after his hard work!
It is so nice to be able to start working on his room. Now I just need the time and energy. We are taking Childbirth Prep classes right now so last night we had to drive an hour to the hospital for our tour. It was far more eventful than it normally would be since there was a Code Red (aka fire) in one corner of the hospital. It was all handled quickly, but it made the group of 10 very pregnant ladies quite nervous! Then today we drive down again for our first actual class.
Our town is small and the hospital isn't the best so most people drive down to Santa Fe where there is a much larger hospital. The drive is annoying, but the doctors are much better. Plus my town is so small I know all the family drama of the only OB so its hard to feel confident in her medical skills when I have watched her family crash and burn. I know that this shouldn't matter, but I can't help it.
So we are spending lots of time in the car. It makes for very long days. Today we have class from 6:30 to 8:30 so we will not get home until around 9:30 at the earliest. I'm usually in bed by 9:30. Then on Wednesday morning I get to drive back for a doctors appointment. I'm getting tired of the car (even though it is my awesome new-to-us Kia Soul).
But even though all this driving is annoying, its a relief to have the classes set. Last week they thought they wouldn't be able to run the full class because only 2 couples had signed up and 3 is their minimum to run a class. So I was freaking out. They wanted to do 3 classes instead of 5 and they wouldn't start until March 20th. Thats a bit too close to my due date for comfort (especially since this weekend I was 1 Braxton Hicks contraction away from having to call my doctor). So as much as I might complain, I am really very glad to be hauling my butt to Santa Fe several times each week.
I'm a little sad not to be moving closer to family, but I'm very relieved not to be moving. On that note, we finally put the crib together!!
34 weeks 2 day & a Crib!! Hubby after his hard work!
It is so nice to be able to start working on his room. Now I just need the time and energy. We are taking Childbirth Prep classes right now so last night we had to drive an hour to the hospital for our tour. It was far more eventful than it normally would be since there was a Code Red (aka fire) in one corner of the hospital. It was all handled quickly, but it made the group of 10 very pregnant ladies quite nervous! Then today we drive down again for our first actual class.
Our town is small and the hospital isn't the best so most people drive down to Santa Fe where there is a much larger hospital. The drive is annoying, but the doctors are much better. Plus my town is so small I know all the family drama of the only OB so its hard to feel confident in her medical skills when I have watched her family crash and burn. I know that this shouldn't matter, but I can't help it.
So we are spending lots of time in the car. It makes for very long days. Today we have class from 6:30 to 8:30 so we will not get home until around 9:30 at the earliest. I'm usually in bed by 9:30. Then on Wednesday morning I get to drive back for a doctors appointment. I'm getting tired of the car (even though it is my awesome new-to-us Kia Soul).
But even though all this driving is annoying, its a relief to have the classes set. Last week they thought they wouldn't be able to run the full class because only 2 couples had signed up and 3 is their minimum to run a class. So I was freaking out. They wanted to do 3 classes instead of 5 and they wouldn't start until March 20th. Thats a bit too close to my due date for comfort (especially since this weekend I was 1 Braxton Hicks contraction away from having to call my doctor). So as much as I might complain, I am really very glad to be hauling my butt to Santa Fe several times each week.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Overwhelmed
In two days, I will be at 34 weeks. That means 6 weeks to go. I'm not sure how to wrap my brain around that. I never thought I would make it here. It is so strange as I sit here with Fin kicking away, how normal that has become to me. But in no more than 7.5 weeks (I'm not okay with going beyond 41 weeks), he won't be kicking away in me, he will be cuddling in my arms. It still doesn't feel real.
Even though our house is full of baby stuff. Even though we now routinely hit the baby section in all the stores we shop at to look for sales. Even with all of this, it still doesn't feel real.
I think a big part of the unreal feeling is that lots of things are still uncertain. We still might move. We still might stay. We have no clue. We are waiting to hear from the company in Texas that hubby interviewed with. At this point if they make a good offer (meeting our salary requirement), we will take it. Until last night, we weren't sure that we would go, even if the offer was good. But my poor hubby is frustrated. The option of starting a company here is still our first choice, but the money men said they would have an answer two weeks ago today. And we are still waiting. So we aren't optimistic. Its still possible, but getting less likely everyday.
I feel like I can't grasp the reality of the baby when I can't picture where I will be when the baby comes. It seems unreal that I have a just in case OB and pediatrician chosen in TX. The realtor that hubby talked to gave us some doctor suggestions and even gave us his wife's phone number since she could better recommend OBs. It is all just so unreal.
And thats why I feel overwhelmed. I know it could be lots worse. I know he could be here already and in the NICU. I know that hubby could have no job offers. I know all of these things, but I also know that it could be better. It was supposed to be better. Hubby was supposed to get converted to a staff member in November. Then our money issues would be gone. Then there would be no question about whether I was going to be able to stay home or not.
And with that, I will quit whining. Hope things are going well in all of your worlds today!!
Even though our house is full of baby stuff. Even though we now routinely hit the baby section in all the stores we shop at to look for sales. Even with all of this, it still doesn't feel real.
I think a big part of the unreal feeling is that lots of things are still uncertain. We still might move. We still might stay. We have no clue. We are waiting to hear from the company in Texas that hubby interviewed with. At this point if they make a good offer (meeting our salary requirement), we will take it. Until last night, we weren't sure that we would go, even if the offer was good. But my poor hubby is frustrated. The option of starting a company here is still our first choice, but the money men said they would have an answer two weeks ago today. And we are still waiting. So we aren't optimistic. Its still possible, but getting less likely everyday.
I feel like I can't grasp the reality of the baby when I can't picture where I will be when the baby comes. It seems unreal that I have a just in case OB and pediatrician chosen in TX. The realtor that hubby talked to gave us some doctor suggestions and even gave us his wife's phone number since she could better recommend OBs. It is all just so unreal.
And thats why I feel overwhelmed. I know it could be lots worse. I know he could be here already and in the NICU. I know that hubby could have no job offers. I know all of these things, but I also know that it could be better. It was supposed to be better. Hubby was supposed to get converted to a staff member in November. Then our money issues would be gone. Then there would be no question about whether I was going to be able to stay home or not.
And with that, I will quit whining. Hope things are going well in all of your worlds today!!
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Happy Thoughts for my Nephew
I want to take a minute to ask everyone to say a pray (or meditate or do whatever it is that you do) for my nephew. He will be having some pretty major surgery in two weeks. He is only 6, but has had fairly severe neck pain all of his life. To hopefully alleviate the pain, they will be removing a small part of his skull (in the back just under where it curves down) and shaving the edge of his T1 vertebrae. This will hopefully solve the problem for life. So please ask for surgeons with steady hands and nurses who will make him feel as good as possible under the circumstances.
I had surgery when I was 12 and I still remember the nurse who took me back to surgery. She was there when I went to sleep and she was right there when I woke up. If I walked into that docs office, I could still pick her out. She was so sweet to me. I really hope he has someone like that. He is at a children's hospital so I would hope that all the nurses are that awesome to the kids.
His older sister is going to come stay with us. I am so glad that we are close enough (opposite sides of the same state) that we can help them out. His dad is in the Air Force and they live in southern New Mexico. Because the population of New Mexico is so small, anytime you have major medical issues that require a specialist, you get sent to Albuquerque. Since we are less than 2 hours from Albuquerque, we can go pick up my niece and still be close enough to go visit him once he is out of the ICU. I'm very glad I have been hoarding my vacation and sick time!
Okay, now back to your regularly scheduled programing and thanks in advance for all the happy thoughts!
I had surgery when I was 12 and I still remember the nurse who took me back to surgery. She was there when I went to sleep and she was right there when I woke up. If I walked into that docs office, I could still pick her out. She was so sweet to me. I really hope he has someone like that. He is at a children's hospital so I would hope that all the nurses are that awesome to the kids.
His older sister is going to come stay with us. I am so glad that we are close enough (opposite sides of the same state) that we can help them out. His dad is in the Air Force and they live in southern New Mexico. Because the population of New Mexico is so small, anytime you have major medical issues that require a specialist, you get sent to Albuquerque. Since we are less than 2 hours from Albuquerque, we can go pick up my niece and still be close enough to go visit him once he is out of the ICU. I'm very glad I have been hoarding my vacation and sick time!
Okay, now back to your regularly scheduled programing and thanks in advance for all the happy thoughts!
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Catching Up on Belly Pics
28 Weeks (and a bit scary. I should have done some make up that day)
30 Weeks 2 Days
32 Weeks 3 Days (I gotta get hubby to do full profile instead of 3/4 angle. I'm bigger than this pic makes me look.)
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Thank Goodness for Weekends!!!
Wow, pregnancy is catching up with me all of a sudden! This week kicked my butt. I work at a bank. I'm a teller and account service rep. In other words, I open/close accounts, deal with IRAs, do deposits & withdrawals. All the basics of the people at the counter and the desks. We are a small branch so we all do everything. Its not very strenuous. I have a chair to sit in as much as I want. The hardest part is that I have to get up and down a lot. I have to run to the printer for nearly every customer. Some days that's once or twice an hour, some days that's every couple of minutes.
The sciatic nerve pain makes getting up hard. Once I move around its not bad, but if I stay on my feet for long then it starts hurting again. Plus my feet swell. I have serious cankles after working all day.
I'm not sure why this is so hard. I feel like I should be able to handle this easily, but by the time that I got home last night, I was wrecked. My back hurt. My feet were killing me. My belly felt like it weighed a ton. I couldn't get comfy on the couch. A hot shower didn't even help. Luckily sleeping for 11 hours did. Well 11 hours minus 5 bathroom trips.
Now I'm couching it. And I plan to couch it most of the weekend. Next week should be a bit easier since we have a holiday on Monday and I have a doc appointment on Friday so I will only work half the day. But hubby will be in TX Wednesday & Thursday so that will make it harder. I will have to walk and feel the animals. Not the hardest thing in the world, I will also have to cook dinner and such when I get off work. Hubby has me very spoiled!! He is great!
Well now I'll quit complaining and go watch some TV.
The sciatic nerve pain makes getting up hard. Once I move around its not bad, but if I stay on my feet for long then it starts hurting again. Plus my feet swell. I have serious cankles after working all day.
I'm not sure why this is so hard. I feel like I should be able to handle this easily, but by the time that I got home last night, I was wrecked. My back hurt. My feet were killing me. My belly felt like it weighed a ton. I couldn't get comfy on the couch. A hot shower didn't even help. Luckily sleeping for 11 hours did. Well 11 hours minus 5 bathroom trips.
Now I'm couching it. And I plan to couch it most of the weekend. Next week should be a bit easier since we have a holiday on Monday and I have a doc appointment on Friday so I will only work half the day. But hubby will be in TX Wednesday & Thursday so that will make it harder. I will have to walk and feel the animals. Not the hardest thing in the world, I will also have to cook dinner and such when I get off work. Hubby has me very spoiled!! He is great!
Well now I'll quit complaining and go watch some TV.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Huge, Gigantic, Enormous Sigh of Relief!
Hubby got a job!!!
Its not the most ideal situation, but it is a job here at the same lab that he is currently at. He is still going to go to his interview in Texas and we still might end up moving there, but if nothing else pans out, HE HAS A JOB!
The best part about this is that it will start as soon as his only post doc is up (on Saturday, talk about cutting it close!) so there will be NO lapse in pay or in insurance coverage!
There are a few reasons that this isn't totally ideal. First off, we expected him to be making more money at this point so that I could stay home with Fin. He will be making the same amount that he has been making for the past two years. With some adjustments to our spending habits, we can make it work for me to stay home. It really just means that I have to cook almost all of our meals and we need to take better advantage of our Sam's membership. It would be a snap if it wasn't for the $475 per month to pay off our IVF loan and our nearly $700 per month in combined student loans. But we will make it work. If we have to, we can deffer student loans for a year while I stay home with the munchkin. I would rather have those to pay for longer than give up my only chance to spend so much time with him.
The other reasons are not as much of a big deal. Mainly if he swithces to this area, he would likely need to stay in this area because this job would take advantage of his clearance (aka top secret-ish clearance). If he applied for other jobs in other areas, he wouldn't be able to explain what he had been doing before. It makes job interviews hard.
But those things aside, hubby has a job! I am just so happy to know that no matter what, we won't have to sell our house and live with (mooch off) family members.
Oh yeah, I'm now 32 weeks!!! Holy cow! Its starting to get super real!
Its not the most ideal situation, but it is a job here at the same lab that he is currently at. He is still going to go to his interview in Texas and we still might end up moving there, but if nothing else pans out, HE HAS A JOB!
The best part about this is that it will start as soon as his only post doc is up (on Saturday, talk about cutting it close!) so there will be NO lapse in pay or in insurance coverage!
There are a few reasons that this isn't totally ideal. First off, we expected him to be making more money at this point so that I could stay home with Fin. He will be making the same amount that he has been making for the past two years. With some adjustments to our spending habits, we can make it work for me to stay home. It really just means that I have to cook almost all of our meals and we need to take better advantage of our Sam's membership. It would be a snap if it wasn't for the $475 per month to pay off our IVF loan and our nearly $700 per month in combined student loans. But we will make it work. If we have to, we can deffer student loans for a year while I stay home with the munchkin. I would rather have those to pay for longer than give up my only chance to spend so much time with him.
The other reasons are not as much of a big deal. Mainly if he swithces to this area, he would likely need to stay in this area because this job would take advantage of his clearance (aka top secret-ish clearance). If he applied for other jobs in other areas, he wouldn't be able to explain what he had been doing before. It makes job interviews hard.
But those things aside, hubby has a job! I am just so happy to know that no matter what, we won't have to sell our house and live with (mooch off) family members.
Oh yeah, I'm now 32 weeks!!! Holy cow! Its starting to get super real!
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