Look Out...I'm Grumpy

Just in case you were planning on getting pregnant at the same time as one spouse is in job limbo and two of your grandparents are in failing health, I would encourage you to reconsider. Or at least take a trip to some remote spot so that you don't kill someone.

Combining pregnancy hormones with this much stress is a bad idea!!! I am currently alternating between being very sad (aka sobbing my face off) and being totally pissed (aka super grumpy at the world).

Hubby and I jokingly talked about how we would totally get pregnant this time since his job is uncertain. We compared it to the likely-hood of a teen getting knocked up in the back seat of a sports car. Its an inevitability. But the whole time we did the IVF stuff, I thought that he would be converted to staff at any minute. How could he not be? The project can't keep going without him. Literally. So why do they keep jerking him around?

I prepared myself for the pregnancy stuff. I'm trying not to complain too much about the nausea (especially since I would be freaked if I didn't have it). I'm trying not to let my grumpiness spill over at work (failed on that today, but usually do fine). But you can't prepare for the extra crap that life throws at you. I'm trying not to stress. I getting scared that being this stressed could cause problems with Blobby (yes we are going to keep calling it that until it exhibits some visible features, he he he).

I know that worrying that I'm too stressed is completely counter productive, but man how do I stop? I am trying to lower my stress with little things. I'm working overtime this week so thats an extra $150 to pay on a credit card. Next week is our heartbeat ultrasound, so we have that to look forward to. Hubby bought me a beautiful necklace when he went to Boulder to visit his grandpa. His grandpa is doing much better. He is able to sit up and talk to everyone. He still isn't out of the woods, but things are looking up for the moment. My grandma has a couple of ladies that she knows in her nursing home, so hopefully she will start having a better time and not be sad that her kids aren't with her 24/7 (she tried really hard to get one of my aunts to move in with her, but my aunt has other ailing relatives that she cares for in another city, so my dad and uncle took turns visiting and cooking for her everyday).

Maybe if I keep reminding myself of these things, I can get out of this funk and be happy again.