Lack of Ovulation, PCOS and South America

Test result so for sure that I didn't ovulate. So we spent the night with some wine and tv from hulu. I have known for many years that I was likely to have trouble getting pregnant.

I was diagnosed with PCOS at 17. I was a smart enough kid to realize that if the only way I can have periods is to be on birth control, getting pregnant would be hard. I asked my mom about it at the time and she told me that I would probably have trouble, but that was a long way off and science is a great thing. Who knows what they will have come up with by the time I'm trying.

My mom also gave me some very good advice. She told me not to obsess about the diseases I had (at the time I still thought I had CMT). She asked me not to get online and start scaring myself with peoples horror stories. I managed to do what she asked until the hubby and I started trying unsuccessfully. That was almost 10 years of ignorant bliss. I knew in the back of my mind that it would be hard. But everything has always worked out in some way.

I have had my share of problems, but they always seem to work out in the end. CMT worked out. I was always terrified that because of my weight issues (which caused lots of self-esteem issues), I would never meet a guy. I had one actual boyfriend before my hubby. Tom. He was such a jerk. But at least I wasn't alone. Then I met the hubby. At first it didn't seem as though our relationship would be able to go anywhere. He was just coming out of a failed marriage. He needed time alone to figure out what he wanted. But I kept at him and eventually we moved in together and once we moved from Texas to New Mexico, I knew that we would eventually get married.

So even that worked out in the end. But for the first time, I am facing the possibility that I may never be able to have a baby. I still have numerous options to try before that possibility becomes a reality, but I want to be prepared.

Next step try Letrozole for at least one cycle. If it gets me to ovulate, we can do several cycles of it to try to get preggo. If it doesn't make me ovulate or if I don't get preggo after 3-4 cycles with Letrozole, we move to either injectable meds or IVF. I am hoping to do at least one cycle with injectables before IVF, but my RE said he is hesitant to do injectables with a woman as young as I am. The worry with injectables is that they work TOO well. It is easy for ovaries to over stimulate. There is about a 20% chance of multiple births with injectables. So to control that I would get to to to Abq every other day during the first half of the cycle. What fun, especially with gas at nearly $3.50 a gallon. After that we would try IVF. We most likely can't afford more than two cycles of IVF. Luckily only the first one is super pricy. Both cycles would be expensive, but the second wouldn't require egg retrieval. IVF would only work if my ovaries can form eggs. And if those eggs are healthy. I have no clue if that is true at this point. If my eggs are not healthy or viable, we would move to egg donation. I'm lucky enough to have a friend who told me she would give me some of her eggs if I need them. She is a gorgeous and brilliant woman so I would be very lucky there. But I know how hard the process is and how invasive so I would never hold her to that offer unless she is totally comfortable with the process. After all of that comes adoption. Not my top choice obviously, but there are lots of great kids out there that just need a chance. But man is it EXPENSIVE!!!

So that is the worst case scenario path. We discussed it last night and the hubby & I agreed that if we haven't got a baby by the time I turn 35 (I'm 28 now) we should give up and move to South America. This decision was inspired by 2 bottles of wine and several episodes of Off the Map (like ER in the middle of the rain forest). We may change the location, but even in the sober light of the morning, I think that if we don't have a baby by then, I am going to need a major change of scenery. We almost moved to Barcelona a couple of years ago. I could handle that or France or who knows where.